something I realized...
Things happen, and you realize that you need to do a course-correction of your life. For me it was the moving away from all the roads that I've been travelling on, and surely and with no hesitation, putting my feet on the trail that is beginning to show itself. It is something I have to do.... have to allow myself to do....and it came upon me so quietly and imperceptibly.
That's when I realized that all the reading and thinking we do, all the sorting out of the tangles in our life that we spend time and energy on, all the dealing with questions like 'is this what I'm all about, is this the real me?' that pop up at the unlikeliest of times, digging and scraping through all the layers of self-protection that we coat ourselves with, painfully pealing off coverings that we had put on for self-preservation, .....all of these lead to a heart-churning that we cannot ignore. They are kind of preparing the flower bed for the sowing......
The change, the fresh planting, as it were, though, when it does have to happen, happens without any fanfare or bugle call, or flash of lightning.....................there is no 'okay, this is it - i'm taking a new road', or ' this is the end of this phase - i'm going to change'. It's something very quiet that happens - it could be something someone dear says, it could be DD's advice, could be something read that resonates inside of you, could be something that's always been there but which you only just see - could be the rain that the wind blows across your window pane, could be that mechanically-done-everyday chore, .............................................and everything just quietly slips into place in our hearts, and we find ourselves on the road we had only hitherto dreamt of....pinpricks to revert, or go back, do happen......but from somewhere deep inside, a strength to withstand these also happens.................and a feeling of peace starts to steal in...
you know you would do well to carry on and not look back.....for that is your road...