OKAY
We use this word, (or its equivalent - right or all right, fine, cool, good), so often but have we realized the power of this word has?
Okay is actually a wonderful word. It has a great deal of meaning built into it. It works as a saving grace in times when you want to say something but can't find the right thing to say. It carries in it a wealth of wisdom, because once you say okay, the word creates a space around you and you can then decide whether you want to carry on talking or just be quiet. Once we realize that our response really doesn't matter to a person who is complaining or cribbing to us, the word 'okay' fills in the blank spaces. When we realize that our opinions are really not wanted or appreciated, even though the person asking for it gives us the feeling that what we say is valued, all we have to do is use 'okay' and bingo....we can walk away intact without getting into any kind of a controversy with the person in question.
The hardest thing to do is to be quiet. To listen quietly without offering any kind of response. There is really no point in either arguing a point or trying to convince anyone. Think about it. The person whom you really trust, who you believe is true to your friendship, who really cares what is happening to you, will never try to impose their thoughts and opinions on you when you download your worries/insecurities/problems/fears on them. They will listen and help you find your own solution. They are just there as a support whether things go right or wrong. Lesson here is that we hear a person through quietly and with full concentration and then, after a pause, when we use the word 'okay', it works beautifully and both people can walk away without either being hurt or feeling dissatisfied. The feeling that has gone out is that you've heard and you're around if and when you are wanted.
I have decided to use this word 'okay' more often now. Enough of being made the scapegoat, enough of my views and ideas being trashed, enough of being trampled on.
On the other side, 'okay' helps deal with discontent and dissatisfaction. We are taught to be grateful for the good things that happen to us, but we forget to be also grateful for the bad things that happen, because dealing with these bad things is what gives us insights and helps us to grow. We know, with our heads, that whatever happens to us happens because it was meant to happen....it happens for a reason. The trouble is internalizing this. We have to make it a part of our thinking and daily living. Here's where the 'okay' helps a lot. Good things happen - okay. Bad things happen - also okay. Difficult things happen - okay. Happy things happen - also okay. Painful things happen - okay. Life, for a bit there, is peaceful - also okay. 'Okay' gives us the leeway to deal with everything and be grateful......You are not asking for anything, you are not offering any answers or solutions, you are just accepting everything that lands on your plate with this most powerful of words - okay...
Okay helps you to step back, allows you to put some space between you and whatever it is that is the issue at the moment, gives you time to formulate an answer or work out a plan....
Thus, talk less. Say only what you mean even if it may not be what the person you are talking to wants to hear. Be quiet - at least then you will not exacerbate a situation. Silently take whatever unfair thing has been handed to you without either trying to prove a point or justify yourself or. Never get into explanation mode.....that is the worst.
Just say.....okay...... 'Okay' helps you move on....helps you to actually flow...