22 June 2016

Why....

do we have to publicly acknowledge, or go to great lengths to explain, or make a huge effort to justify what we believe in, or what or who we are, or why we think the way we do, or why we enjoy the things and people we enjoy...why we choose to live life the way we do?

I'm right now deeply disturbed by what is happening in my country - acknowledge that my ancestors were Hindus or else there is no place for me in this country, hide my identity as a Christian in order to avoid becoming the target of someone's hatred...

Plus,

I have to play down the fact that I am more comfortable in English than in my mother tongue, hide that I love the best in western culture and civilization, enjoy wearing western wear, prefer English movies to Hindi or those in the vernacular, for fear of being taunted and ridiculed......

And,

Be very careful about what I write on Twitter or in Facebook or anywhere on the net, lest I get swamped and threatened by trolls...

It's not that I don't find anything good in my own culture - I do...but I also love the West....

It's as if my Indian-ness is always in question...always under the scanner....

And I am hating it.

As I said I believe and I very firmly do that first and last I am a human being and I do believe that we need to respect everyone as human being first without their having to prove not only that they are human but they are our version of human.

My Principal at Isabella Thoburn College at our Baccalaureate ceremony ended her exhortation by telling us that we should not bend our knee or head in front of any man save God nor any thing save that which was good and just and honorable in God's sight. Through childhood and into adulthood there was never any place in our home for any of this nonsense of having to define who I am....

And though I do go through periods of fear and distress, I have decided that I will not stoop to this profiling - not for myself and certainly not for my way of life that has never ever had any place for this kind of fool thing...