in my daily meanderings. Something about her resonated with me....
Did a little more finding out about Lamott. Here was a writer attuned to the very real, day-to-day feelings that most of us go through, and I'd like to share some of her thoughts.
“Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.”
“And I felt like my heart had been so thoroughly and irreparably broken that there could be no real joy again, that at best there might eventually be a little contentment. Everyone wanted me to get help and rejoin life, pick up the pieces and move on, and I tried to, I wanted to, but I just had to lie in the mud with my arms wrapped around myself, eyes closed, grieving, until I didn’t have to anymore.”
“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft. I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it.”
“You can either practice being right or practice being kind.”
“Your problem is how you are going to spend this one and precious life you have been issued. Whether you're going to spend it trying to look good and creating the illusion that you have power over circumstances, or whether you are going to taste it, enjoy it and find out the truth about who you are.”
“It's funny: I always imagined when I was a kid that adults had some kind of inner toolbox full of shiny tools: the saw of discernment, the hammer of wisdom, the sandpaper of patience. But then when I grew up I found that life handed you these rusty bent old tools - friendships, prayer, conscience, honesty - and said 'do the best you can with these, they will have to do'. And mostly, against all odds, they do.”
She's helped me get a grip on a lot of things I tend to agonize over: the need to grieve over the broken pieces of our lives and then get up and go on, instead of rushing off to find a new way and getting even more lost and broken. Also, the need to just hug someone who is going through this instead of coming up with instant solutions; there is no need to be perfect. Nor should we demand it of anyone; to always and always only be kind.
We have the tools, as she says, and these are more than enough to carve out our lives in as true a manner as we can.