that we need to live - really LIVE, as opposed to exist or drift - is 'purpose'. No matter what we do or plan to do, there has to be a purpose behind it....even rambling has a purpose - to ramble and not let the mind dwell on any one thing in particular. The smallest thing we have to do at work, the smallest chore at home...no matter what, we need to do it with purpose. Often we do things because we have to and not because we want to....to overcome the resentment that this is sure to breed, it is better..no wiser..to spend a couple of moments to find the purpose behind the task confronting us and find out what we are feeling resentful about doing. This requires an unflinching honesty. It's the same vis-à-vis people. There are some people we would like to meet professionally. We need to have the purpose behind meeting them, very clear in our mind. If we are meeting a friend for coffee, know why we are meeting her or him and go on from there. Besides the fact that we will be able to handle any misunderstandings that may arise, we will be able to contribute more to the moment...get more out of the interaction...This too requires a resoluteness of spirit..a courageous honesty...because then we may decide not to meet up with certain people, or be cautious in our dealings with certain people, or maybe cancel meeting certain people altogether.
It's difficult but, believe me this is the critical factor. Once we get to the purpose of something, after peeling off all the layers of thought and reflex actions and all that is covering it, we will start feeling stronger, fresher, braver, and more with it...more in tune with ourself and the task in hand.
Try it out. From the routine tasks of daily household chores, to working out in the gym or going for a walk, to setting the table for a meal, to an outing to the mall, to going to the cinema....to everything...every task big or small....to every meeting with people.....find the purpose.....and plunge whole-heartedly into it.