This, by Dr. Hans Selye, clarified it completely for me:
Stress doesn't kill us, our reaction to it does.
Which automatically puts the focus on our inner selves (one cannot always blame the outside world...)
Adding to this was another thought: We bring stress to life when we take something we see/hear/read inside of ourselves. Before we know it, our thought processes have started working overtime, our perceptions take off in various tangents, our brains start dissecting and analyzing, and then....we get caught in our own thought-noodles creating more complex noodles, till we are completely entangled in our own noodle mess. Meanwhile all the other connected parts are slowly but surely empathizing with this noodly condition, and getting tighter and tighter, till we are a tight bundle of taut strings. But, has the outside changed? No---everything and everyone is carrying quite merrily...and us? we have incapacitated ourselves quite thoroughly.
The example that suited me best to explain this to myself was this: I go for a walk on the road. There is huge traffic sometimes. Everyone, naturally has a right to a bit of the road. Then, there are the rambling pedestrians, focused-on-their-destination pedestrians, blissfully-unmindfully-connected-to-their-iPod folk, running-to-catch the bus commuters, have-a-snack-while-you-wait-for-the-bus/auto fast food wallahs with their moving stalls, dogs, cows, cyclists, and motorbike riders who believe that if there is no place on the road, there is certainly place on the sidewalks. Add to these, are those who smell bizops. They set up their wares quite attractively on what remains of the sidewalks. This is the reality. If I process these through my mind processes, instead of concentrating on my walk, the chaos and noise is definitely going to get to me, making me totally stressed-out. The reality, though, remains the same, and everyone is carrying on the same way, quite happily,...so, where did that leave me? and only me? Overwhelmed by and submerged in stress.
But, if I focus on my walk, on every step, and on the ground I am walking on, then the environment just fades away out of my consciousness. Best of all, nothing has got under my skin, and I don't feel stressed at all. On the contrary, I feel quite refreshed.
This also brought home to me the concept of mindfulness and to be fully concentrated only the task in hand...
Am feeling so much happier and at ease inside of myself...