Sensitivity...

in speech is imperative. I don't think one can ever or should ever compromise on good speech.

Imagine someone speaking to us--

We're all noodle heads, and we all process what we hear, differently.

For some of us listeners, the words ping head on and we respond off the top of our heads, usually without thinking.

With some of us, the words cause all the noodles to go into a spin, and if we respond right away, chances are we will quickly regret what we say.

If we allow the spin to settle into a pattern, but do not allow for a little space, our understanding of what we have heard would probably allow us to give some sort of reasonable response, which, on later mulling, we would wish we could change/take back/rephrase.

Some of us who allow our mind to think clearly about what we have heard, after the noodle spin settles, the response is likely to be a carefully chosen one. We choose, with care, delicacy, and tact, the words we want to use and the tone of voice, and see to it that the meaning of what we are trying to say is clear with no undertones, or dark overtones, or innuendos, or hidden meanings.

And this last, is like music...

To paraphrase Hazrat Inayat Khan's teaching: 'Each individual composes the music of his own life; if he injures another he breaks the harmony and there is discord in the melody of his life,' so also, the words we use should not cause any kind of discord in the harmony of the life of the person we are talking with, concurrently keeping the melody of our life intact.

We have the freedom to choose how we want to speak. Question is are we using this wonderful freedom to make our speech beautiful or are we just going on as we are, hiding behind a 'Take it or leave it' stance. The point is not about taking it or leaving it, the point is about not causing dissonance in the general environment, or a harsh jarring in someone's life-harmony, and at the same time not totally jangling up our own life-harmony...

Sharing my meditation from the White Bison...

"Silence is the cornerstone of character."          
~ Charles Alexander Eastman, OHIYESA SANTEE SIOUX

Be still and know. Anyone can verbally attack another. Anyone can be a smart aleck. Anyone can be angry and tell other people things that will hurt them. Anyone can be sarcastic, devaluating and belittling. It takes a Warrior to be silent. Silence is so powerful. Silence can be so loving.

Our task here on earth is...

only, only, only to create ourselves. Nothing else. Life throws numerous challenges at us right from the moment we are born: where we are born, where we live, who all we come in contact with, who we choose to love or hate, where we are placed to work.....every single action. Some of these affirm us, some negate us, some build us up, some destroy us....through it all, the one thing that is constantly happening to us is change - we keep changing

We can either leave this to the forces of Nature, or we can take a hand, understand, chip off, tweak...do whatever has to be done, through happiness and deep pain to go on creating and re-creating and re-re-creating ourselves.

We do not take away anything with us when we finally return to dust....but our soul and spirit will find peace and fulfillment if we have lived as better people...

A bit of Mohawk wisdom...

Wisdom is how you live and how you interpret what your mother
and father, what your grandmothers and grandfathers have told you about
this world - and then how you interpret that into the fact of living every day."

The key words here are 'how you live'.

Time, then, to stop and introspect on how we live our life.

Do we:

drift from day to day, aimlessly, just doing our chores and what is required of us?

fill our days with noise and activity because otherwise we would be forced to face ourselves?

embrace solitude?

seek to make our life tranquil?

try to be easygoing instead of being hyper about everything?

believe that only we have all the answers to everyone's problems and questions, and thus try and control all situations and people?

approach the day with joyfulness, grateful for the beauty of another day....a brand new day?

express an interest in people and all that we see around us?

look for answers in Nature, seeing as we are all a part of Nature and if we just be still for a moment and look around us, she will reveal our answers?

think about the balance, rhythm and harmony of life and try and work towards that?



What we are looking at is a redefinition of our life. Periodic but steady redefinition. An interpretation of what we have received from our parents and grandparents regarding every day living and then how we incorporate that interpretation into actual living...every day.

Virginia Woolf asserts that “a self that goes on changing is a self that goes on living.” Being pleased with ourselves as we are is, clearly, not the best thing.

Interpreting and incorporating wisdom gained into our thinking and then redefining ourselves can be a nightmare, but I don't think it is really an option. The question then begs, do we just plain ignore the fact that we need to change some of our ways, add and subtract some of the characteristics we've adopted consciously or unconsciously, adapt and tweak our thinking? Do we discard out of hand the wisdom handed down to us because we think it is not relevant to us in this day and age? Are we filling our days with all kinds of activities, simply so that our senses get dulled and we don't have to face the brutal fact that we are not living but just existing?

Since we are alive, we may as well do something about our life and make living a joyous experience...

Powerful words to remember and live...

James Cavitt, an inmate at San Quentin State Prison says men and women behind bars are working hard to create better lives and futures for themselves after they serve their time.

This is from a piece he wrote: 'Where I live'


I live in a world where most people are too afraid to go. Surrounded by tall concrete walls, steel bars where razor wire have a way of cutting at the hopes for a brighter tomorrow. I live in a world that kill people who kill people in order to teach people to kill people is wrong. Imagine that. Better yet, imagine a world where healed people help hurt people heal and become strong. I live in a world that has been called hell on earth by those trapped inside, but I've come to the stark realization that prison is really what you make it. You see, in spite of the harshness of my reality there is a silver lining. I knew that my freedom was going to come. It was just a matter of time and so I treated my first steps as if they were my last mile and I realized that you don't have to be free in order to experience freedom. Just because you are free doesn't mean that you have freedom. Many of us for years have been battling our inner demons. We walk around smiling when inside we're really screaming 'freedom'. Don't you get it? We're all serving time. We're just in different places. As for me, I choose to be free from the prisons i've created. The key-forgiveness. Actions-my witness. If we want freedom, then we got to think different. Because freedom - it isn't a place. It's a mindset. 


(http://www.ted.com/talks/john_legend_redemption_song?utm_source=tedcomshare&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=tedspread#t-212388)

A word of caution...

to all of us who are battling with past hurts, no matter what form they take...

It has to be a strong conscious decision to break with the past. Why strong? because the past has a way of creeping up on us unbidden, seeping into our hearts through doors that have been blocked to them and then spreading their poison.

I am sharing this because this is what happens to me.

This poison takes two forms - One is of hurting...a dark, deep hurting when your whole being wants to cry out, and it does, reliving the pain, the sadness, the darkness and the big question why me goes round and round keeping the poison alive. The second is, strangely of comfort. It is a distorted comfort, but comfort it is because we are now in a zone we are used to, an area we understand, and we know that the loving presence of our friends and family will cocoon us.

Neither of these will liberate us from the cycle of hurt and pain.

At this time we are unable to recollect all the wise sayings we've made a note of. However, I'm finding that the more I read about pain management, or tap into the wisdom of Maya Angelou, or learn about people who have battled all odds to live a good, productive and peaceful life of joyfulness, slowly these start to filter in and push the poison out. To this when we add our own slight strength of pushing out the horrible things filling our mind, not only is the poison drained off, but we also feel stronger about ourselves.

It is the mind playing tricks on us and most times we couter these cruel tricks, but there are times when we can't or fail to see that they have crept in and spread.

So, next time the sadness comes on, STOP. This is the first step and it is the hardest. Then work on removing the poison.

Surely we deserve to live in the fullness of life...

Darkness...

of mind and heart can be so overwhelming.

Thing is, it needn't be.

And yet, more often than not, it is.

Why?

Because darkness is like a whirlpool. It stays in the yard of our mind, silently, watchfully, even enticingly, and the instant we are unmindful, relax our mind, or feel that nothing can destroy our hard-won peace and serenity this time around, we fall into this whirlpool. It makes us feel that there is only this left for us....this oblivion.

But,

Living is not oblivion. One has to strive hard to live fully with joyfulness. One has to work hard at keeping the darknesses at bay.

God never promised us roses or a life without pain or that life would be easy.....but He did promise us the strength to overcome the thorns and the pain and He did promise us that He would be with us through it all, He would see us through...

Here is an anonymous poem - hope it will help us see our own light...because no matter how much a loved one holds our hand, in the end we have to fight and vanquish our darknesses ourselves.



I asked for strength.
God gave me difficulties to make me strong.-----------------------------so when we go through difficulties, believe that they are making us strong...

I asked for wisdom.
God gave me problems to solve.---------------------------drowning in problems and issues of all kinds? Believe that in solving them we are gaining in wisdom...

I asked for prosperity.
God gave me brawn and brain to work.-----------------------------------how easy life would have been if we had a little more money! But no, we can have great happiness, indeed real happiness when we work for what we want, redefining our needs as we go along...

I asked for courage.
God gave me dangers to overcome.--------------------Fearful? Afraid? Believe that overcoming fear - and this is hard work - will make us laugh in the face of all that tries to scare us and drag us down...

I asked for patience.
God placed me in situations where I was forced to wait.-------------------------how nice it would be if we achieved our goals through an easier path...maybe a little quicker too would be good. Believe that every roadblock is teaching us patience...and this patience will see us through great darknesses because we would have learnt that nothing that is good comes easy...the right answers take time in coming...

I asked for love.
God gave me troubled people to help.-----------------------oh to bask in someone's love! Believe that if this does not happen, then we are being called to lavish all our love on those who really need it to get them through their darkness...and thus drawing us out of ours...

I asked for favors.
God gave me opportunities.------------------------would be nice to receive a favor now and then...would make life a little easier... Believe that every chance seized, every moment of hard work, every contingency overcome, becomes a favor in our life...

I received nothing I wanted.
I received everything I needed.-----------------true! 

Come we can do it....we have to do it alone, but knowing that every human being has his/her own darknesses to deal with and overcome will help us know we are not the only ones in our struggle to lift ourselves up and make our personal world a better world for us to LIVE in...