in the weeks before she passed on, I first came across this word 'caregiver'. I was reading how those who look after men and women like Mum, in those weeks and days leading to the final day, need special counselling and training; they may be family members, or people who have been hired exclusively for the task. (These are different from the nurses who provide physical care). And the word used for these specially-trained people is caregivers. It's a fascinating word, and self-explanatory - to give care......to look after......and carries with it the huge responsibility of making the helpless patient feel loved and cared for. Why caregivers need to be trained and counselled is because more than anything else it pulls and tugs at the heartstrings......here is this person, who was once active, and who has looked after her/his family, carried out her/his responsibilities, loved living.....today, lying helplessly in front of you needing your time, love, and care....
This morning, I came across this in my meditation, and it clarifies things a little more....
“The lifelong process of caregiving is the ultimate link between caregivers of all ages. You and I are not just in a phase we will outgrow. This is lifebirth, death, and everything in between...The care continuum is the cycle of life turning full circle in each of our lives. And what we learn when we spoon-feed our babies will echo in our ears as we feed our parents. The point is not to be done. The point is to be ready to do again.”
- Paula C. Lowe
The key words, to my mind, are 'The point is to be ready to do again.'