anything get to us, we are allowing it to invade our personal space - the space of freedom. This is a space we need to guard and if we love ourselves, we will do this. Loving ourselves seems to be very difficult to do. If we love ourselves, we will take care of ourselves and that includes not letting anything mar us mentally, emotionally or psychologically. A small example: My DD told me I was hunching a great deal - while sitting, standing, walking. I realized after a lot of looking into myself that this was my body's way of protecting me from hurt/sadness/and any kind of upset. Obviously I was allowing things to get into my personal space. Now that I am conscious about it, I'm working towards clearing this up. It is not that we are perfect - far from it. But we need to work through our own imperfections without allowing ourselves to be made to feel guilty or bad about these imperfections.
There are times when people are nasty, say hurtful things, or try to provoke us. If we allow this to get to us then things take a wrong turn. What does this getting to us entail? We allow ourselves to feel bad, question ourselves, be harsh with ourselves, and put ourselves down. There are even times when try to counter what we are being accused of or blamed for. We go to great lengths to prove that we are not what we are being painted as. It doesn't help. The person who has sent this poisonous dart has gone his/her way and we are left trying to patch up our broken/shattered/disturbed/upset selves. Result: Feelings of inadequacy, deep despondency, insecurity....to name some of the horrible things that we experience.
It's not an easy thing to do, but when someone is nasty, and needling you, either keep a strict control on your tongue, or, if you cannot do that, then walk away...just turn on your heel and walk away. You'll find it very easy then, to tell the person, at a later, calmer point, that you don't appreciate the way he/she talked or behaved.
Not taking it personally means just this......not letting anything or anyone (other than your child) come into your personal space. That space is sacrosanct...