...and this is besides insisting that I learn how to drive and teaching me how to hook rugs!...Ma:Just stop what you are doing...the dishes can be piled up in the sink, you know - leave it for now - you can always return to it after refreshing your soul with a break...the world is not going to stop revolving...nor is there going to be a catastrophe...There is no such thing as taking only 1 break a day... you can take as many as you want. (Strangely, I see that all that I had planned to do during the course of the day, does get done - but with a difference - I have not got even a teeny bit stressed out).You can take a mid-day nap - plus - you can take a tiny nap other than at mid-day. (Delicious!).
Why don't you just lie down and gaze at your fave pictures, or listen to your fave music...you could even have another cup of coffee...The house needn't be squeaky clean - (I guess it's more important for me to stay calmer and more relaxed, so I'd better spend some time working on that)...The washing machine needs some rest too...Don't dwell on the sad-bad things that happen. Just be quiet (the inner clamor does get still) - it WILL pass - it DOES pass. (Best is, there is no bitter aftermath...)You have the right to be just plain old you...you needn't sparkle and shine all the time...You are allowed to believe in your own special interests - the world is neither going to condemn you for them nor stop you from having them...SO!!! Just get on with them...Okay. And, having never caved in to rules ever, I don't need to start now..........................................and the world has not come to an end--it is still spinning---and spinning happily..................
I've been reading Ayn Rand's 'Atlas Shrugged'. It's possibly the second or third time I'm reading it and as usual, when I re-re-read a book, new thoughts pop out at me. This time the question in my mind is whether this financial meltdown that the world is going through, sort of similar to the situation described in Atlas Shrugged. Is it? There do seem to be strains of similarities in the two conditions. Greed versus responsibility and self-seeking aggrandizement and selfishness versus true regard and respect for oneself and one's abilities, where you earn what you get and do not give or take the undeserved...
I do believe that a peaceful home, full of positive energies is the only antidote to the outside world. You can face anything, go through any hardship, bear all travails, overcome all hurt and pain, and meet any disaster if you have a tranquil home to come back to. Home can be a tiny little corner - it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is what you do to make that space a haven of serenity.
In the middle of pain and suffering
The smell of jasmine
This morning, my money plant taught me a lesson. It is a young plant, and I fell in love with it as soon as the gardener brought it up. It has beautiful leaves, pale cream with light green streaks. It's a very young plant, and I kept it as near the door as I could, the better to protect it. I love my plants and care for them very lovingly and carefully. I water them every day and keep the leaves free from dust and see to it that nothing happens to them. With great happiness I saw one tiny leaf after another emerge from the stem. However, to my dismay, I saw that as soon as the leaves became a little big, they were falling off. Now there are only 2 leaves left, and then it struck me. The plant needed the harsh heat and hot winds to strengthen it. It needed the dry earth. This pampering was doing it no good. It needed to undergo Nature's toughening process...
Aren't we like this plant? We think we can grow in a protected, controlled place, cocooned from the outside world. We feel apprehensive about facing the world. We feel scared when the harsh winds of change blow, and wish we could hide somewhere. We curse and rail at our fate for having put us in trying situations. Paradox is that we need these to grow - we need the harshness and even cruelties of life to test our mettle and make our true worth come out. The gardener had told me not to water the plants every day - the roots have to go down deeper and deeper to suck out the water from the soil, only then would the roots become strong and spread out. Isn't this a lesson for us as well? The comforts of life will never allow us to stretch ourselves. It is only when we learn to do without that we learn what is really worthwhile, and what the true value of things are. If we allow ourselves to be surrounded by goodies, we will never know what we are capable of, we will never be able to explore the goodies that lie within us...
Truly, we just have to allow Nature to teach us... what better and more loving teacher than her.
With the newspapers and news channels focusing incessantly on Shashi Tharoor, accusations flying fast and furious at him from all quarters, and with only him defending himself, all kinds of thoughts came into my mind. For a while there it almost seemed as if he had turned the whole country on its head. Political analysts are being asked their opinions, wise old politicians are being asked what they think, journalists are putting forth their inferences, and all the while this one man has been trying to hold his head above troubled, churning waters. No one seems to be coming to his aid. Hard to believe that only a little while ago, he was the darling of the media and the younger generation of politicians. So what went wrong? I don't claim to know much about politics, but one thing seems to stand out. Tharoor seems to have made many people uncomfortable. Whether it is his UN background, or his lifestyle, or his language, he has not stepped on, but , in fact, has jammed everyone's toes in the Indian dust. And the establishment has hit back - hard. Our country is totally and thoroughly amoral and hypocritical. It is against this backdrop that this man - flamboyant, knowledgeable and with the gift of the gab, makes his entrance. A good debater, he has tried by his debating skills to carve out a place for himself in an arena where everyone talks in a language which is full of double meanings, and half-truths which change with the direction of the wind. There is a very wise saying that only those who have not sinned should cast the first stone. In our political scenario, is there anyone who is really clean? and if there are one or two people, they conveniently pull out the 'chuh-chuh-chuh-nodding the head both ways' attitude. I guess the thinking is, 'why on earth would I want to jeopardize my position?' or,'do I know you at all?' or what happens usually is to agree with all parties concerned, kind of a run with the hares and hunt with the hounds phenomenon. Honesty and up-front talking and outspokenness don't stand a chance here.This is when this word 'circumspect' jumped into my mind. The answer, to my mind, lies in this word. People are ready to accept, people are ready to listen, and people are ready to change their thinking only and only and only if the person trying to effect all this is circumspect. Even if a person is right, legally, ethically or morally, no one will accept that person if he rides roughshod over other peoples' feelings and sentiments. Right or wrong our feelings and sentiments are ours and we all tend to be fiercely protective about them. We would be willing to change them provided we felt good about the person suggesting the change. What then does this important word mean. According to the dictionary, it means, among other meanings, to be cautious, discreet, prudent, clear-sighted and sagacious. In a country with so much diversity in every area of life, the only way to do things is to tread slowly, carefully and in a very, very low-keyed manner. No one in our country, by and large, would deny another a place of importance, unless he is threatened with real or imaginary threats. No matter what the position one has, one has to be conscious of the responsibilities it carries. Otherwise, be the happy junta. Tharoor had much to give the country and he would have been able to , and the people would have accepted him, but only within our system. Corrupt, awful, long-winded, whatever, but that is the system we have and that is the system we are all working in and that is the system in which changes are happening too. Any public position draws attention, no matter how low or high that public position is. And, yes, people will (mis) perceive, (mis) read and (mis) understand. But if our leaders are circumspect, then the 'mis's will be less, and the country will gain more, and we the happy, squabbling, fractious, tamasha-loving junta will be the beneficiaries!
Summer days bring so many memories to mind. There was always something very special about summer. For one thing it was holiday time - 2 whole delicious months of holidays. Summer times meant dinners out on the lawn. Light from the verandah streaming out giving the lawn a fairytale look. If we had watermelons for dinner, there would be watermelon lanterns on the table. The lawn was watered morning and evening, so it was nice and cool. Feet on wet grass, lovely cool feeling...The fragrance of summer flowers, especially the Raat ki Rani and jasmines, would fill the air. The 'girls' would pin a sprig, or string of these in the hair...exotic feeling...Crepe myrtle, mango and acacia trees cast their magical spell. Sometimes we'd pack dinner, and drive to the Ridge, where we'd spread mats under a spreading gul mohur and have dinner in the lovely summer breeze looking down at the lights twinkling below. After dinner, our beds would be laid out on the lawn, with mosquito nets, and we used to go to sleep looking at the stars and the moon. We'd try and identify the North Star,the Great Bear, and the Orion. We'd pretend we were part of the Milky Way...When day broke, so that we didn't have to wake up too early, our bedspreads would be draped on the mosquito nets to shield us from the morning sun. Up by 7, the whole long lazy day stretched before us. Sometimes, very early in the morning, we'd pack sandwiches and take our dogs and walk to the two small hills close by, called Bada Shimla and Chhota Shimla. We'd climb to the top, watch the sun rise, have our snack and run down the slope, and come home to a good breakfast. Of course we had to study till 10 every morning, then it was reading and practicing the piano till lunch. The dogs happy to have us at home would refuse to be tied up outside and would stay with us indoors. Of course we'd pretend that they were protecting us from pirates and robbers! Snooze after lunch, and then from 4 o'clock onwards, after tea, it was just play, play and play. We'd be on our cycles going round and round, or racing, especially down the slope. Sometimes we'd play hide-and-seek, or robbers and police, on our cycles. We had the whole campus to play in! Sheer bliss!! Summer meant endless glasses of lemonade or orangeade ice cubes, or when we grew older, iced tea. Sometimes, the big garden tank would be filled with water and we were allowed to jump and play in it. How many games we invented!!! Later when we shifted to the duplex, we used to sleep on the terrace. The terrace used to be flooded and we would wade through the water to get to our beds! what fun. We thought we were in gondolas and wove all kinds of fantasies around our beds. Dinner was always out on the small lawn on the side of the house. The vegetable garden at the back had the most wonderful fruit trees. Bliss to just pluck the fruits and eat them. It was slurping on juicy mangoes, and planting the seeds. It was also gorging on wood apple, mulberries, pummelos and grapefruits. If we managed to steal a raw mango, then it meant smuggling some chilli powder and salt from the kitchen, and eating the mango with this mix, eyes and nose streaming... The fruit trees were ideal too for climbing up and settling down with our story books, completely lost, till someone yelled at us to go inside. Sometimes we'd imagine we were living the Swiss Family Robinson life! I can still get the smell of mint! so much of it used to grow near the tank. Predominant among the flowers were the ginger lilies and gardenia. Wonderful, wonderful flowers. I always wondered how in the hot summer, the brightest flowers bloomed - gul mohur, yellow acacia, flame of the forest. We'd use the stamens from a red flower (I'm not sure of the name) to have fights. There would be only these gorgeous red flowers on the tree - hardly any leaves. The stamens had long curved stems with round heads, and we used to curve the stems of our stamens around the stems of our 'enemy's' stamens, and try to yank off the head! of course the one who managed the most be-headings was the winner! or we'd use the petals of another flower (don't know the mane, but they hang down in colorful bunches), to stick onto our nails. For that game, we'd be fashionable ladies! It was the only time we expected chauvinism from our brothers. The rest of the time we expected to be a part of all games! Sometimes we'd fix up a little space in the garage and pretend it was in turns a school, a home, a cave, or just somewhere we could hide when we had our squabbles! There'd be times when we enacted all the Enid Blyton stories we could. Happy, carefree, summer days!!
