our actions are guided by what others may think of us (in reality no one really has that kind of time or energy to think about what we are doing), or by what others may do in a similar situation (but we are, each of us, guided by our thoughts, and thoughts are our very own personal domain).
How often do we honestly confront what we really want to do deep down? We are so busy whitewashing what we want to do so that we look good in the eyes of people (in whose minds we, in all probability, don't even feature, and even if we do this is our life we are talking about isn't it?), or we are trying to find ways and means of giving our actions a coat of self-righteous paint (who are we trying to fool?), or we devise fantastic explanations and complicated and circuitous reasons for our actions in order to gain the other person's empathy (who really cares?), or we speak with bravado, maybe to prop up our own selves because deep down there is no resonance (who is impressed, anyway?).
How often do we do (or not do) things because that is what we want to do (or not do) - because we believe it will give us happiness - because we know that, for us, it is the right thing to do - because we know it is good for our souls.....? We spend our time and energy craving for recognition or approval from other people whereas all we have to do is to look into our own hearts and souls.....This is the difficult and scary part but it is the only thing that will bring fulfillment and peace...