get a grip on things...as in, you may be able to understand how to deal with something....maybe....maybe not.....but you can try to.....and maybe in the end you will succeed in getting a grip on things....the option being that if you do not get a grip on it, you can always leave it be and move on.
You can also try to get a grip on yourself, that is, make an effort to control your emotions - this comes with practice....and with a lot of effort, you may actually be able to control the way you behave....be 'cool', never mind that your insides are being eaten up....(that can be dealt with in privacy)
It's not the good that one has a problem with - it's the sad, the bad, the ugly side of life that is so difficult. And our trying to 'get a grip' only makes it more complicated on the one hand, and on the other, completely destroys us.....and no 'grip' happens....
I feel,..no....am beginning to believe, that you cannot get a grip on life. Life is too fluid and keeps changing....I've come to believe that the only thing we can do is to go along with it, and then, slowly, sometimes very slowly, it unfolds into something we can understand and deal with....