'Catch me if you can' got me thinking...
When parents fail to realize what a wonderful gift life gives them in the form of their children, and that they have a great responsibility towards that gift, they cause huge, huge damage. For parent a child is a child, not a pal, for subconsciously the child centers his/her whole attention and life on his parents. Even if he does not understand what his parents are thinking, he/she is very protective about them. Of course, parents make mistakes, for we are but human, but we need to set things right as best we can. We need to teach our child the difference between right and wrong and that it is not all right or fun to do wrong things or cheat anyone....Once there is a child, the parent has to remember that there have to be changes in lifestyle, in choices, in, well, the whole of life........or else, it is the child who suffers needlessly and painfully...
If there is a compassionate but firm, correct yet approachable, kind but straightforward mentor, as was the detective in the film, he can reform a life gone totally haywire...
If society allows you to have a second chance, without blame or stigma, the contribution of this reformed person to society is invaluable...
Watch the film....
29 February 2012
23 February 2012
Quite, quite iconoclastically....
would re-incarnation be something like the recycling of our bodies???
We all change...
in many ways - temperamentally, in our likes and dislikes, habits.... .As life's experiences touch us, some pass us by, some stain us, some cut us deep making grooves where there were none, some enhance us and lighten us, some bring about deviations, some add finer lines in different directions to existing ones...and so we all change...
While some of us cope well, some of us find it difficult mainly because those around us go 'but you weren't like this!' or 'this is something new?!' or 'why are you changing now?' or 'you're becoming very different'.....
It's taken me this long to realize that we actually don't need to hide, or negate, or dilute, or reject out of hand these changes that are taking place in us - we need to celebrate them. And hope that people who have known you 'forever' will also accept, appreciate, and celebrate these changes. (I'm not too sure what will happen if they don't - guess, like Scarlet O'Hara says, 'We'll think about that tomorrow.' But on a serious note, that is something we'll have to deal with, without selling our souls.)
Changes may include bad ones - but then that's a risk one has to take because no one ever said only good things will or can happen. In any case, bad change always gets knocked out!!!! hard, sometimes!!!!!!
So, first things first, let's do a checklist on ourselves first, and see where we've been trashing ourselves just to gain acceptance, and then take it on from there - we really need to respect the fact that we change, or we wouldn't be alive...
While some of us cope well, some of us find it difficult mainly because those around us go 'but you weren't like this!' or 'this is something new?!' or 'why are you changing now?' or 'you're becoming very different'.....
It's taken me this long to realize that we actually don't need to hide, or negate, or dilute, or reject out of hand these changes that are taking place in us - we need to celebrate them. And hope that people who have known you 'forever' will also accept, appreciate, and celebrate these changes. (I'm not too sure what will happen if they don't - guess, like Scarlet O'Hara says, 'We'll think about that tomorrow.' But on a serious note, that is something we'll have to deal with, without selling our souls.)
Changes may include bad ones - but then that's a risk one has to take because no one ever said only good things will or can happen. In any case, bad change always gets knocked out!!!! hard, sometimes!!!!!!
So, first things first, let's do a checklist on ourselves first, and see where we've been trashing ourselves just to gain acceptance, and then take it on from there - we really need to respect the fact that we change, or we wouldn't be alive...
Sharing...
something that's been on my mind...
Remember Will Smith's Pursuit of Happyness? That movie taught me a very important thing -
Go back to how Will Smith in his pursuit of a job goes from organization to organization trying to sell his bone-density scanner. In a chance meeting with Dean Witter, he impresses Witter by his ability to solve a Rubik's Cube during a short cab ride, leading to a change of course and his becoming an intern stockbroker. Fighting against huge odds in his personal life, he struggles to learn this new discipline, and realizes that maximizing his client contacts and profits is the only way to earn the one position that he and 20 others are vying for. This is something Will has never done, but he works out many ways to make his phone calls. Eventually, of course his hard work pays off, he gets the post and the rest is history...
What struck me, and keeps coming back to my mind is his politeness - impeccable politeness, warm politeness, not something he is doing as an exercise, genuine politeness suppressing his own hurt and problems... He acknowledges every person, and expresses his gratitude for every little chance he gets. While talking to his prospective clients, he thanks them every single time without any bitterness or grudge, even though he knows they are either stalling, or rejecting his proposition.
Swallowing, swallowing, swallowing (sometimes writhing in hurt and the injustice of a situation)....but always maintaining a positive politeness.....
In the end, this politeness is what lingers as a perfume when one recalls the person....
Remember Will Smith's Pursuit of Happyness? That movie taught me a very important thing -
Go back to how Will Smith in his pursuit of a job goes from organization to organization trying to sell his bone-density scanner. In a chance meeting with Dean Witter, he impresses Witter by his ability to solve a Rubik's Cube during a short cab ride, leading to a change of course and his becoming an intern stockbroker. Fighting against huge odds in his personal life, he struggles to learn this new discipline, and realizes that maximizing his client contacts and profits is the only way to earn the one position that he and 20 others are vying for. This is something Will has never done, but he works out many ways to make his phone calls. Eventually, of course his hard work pays off, he gets the post and the rest is history...
What struck me, and keeps coming back to my mind is his politeness - impeccable politeness, warm politeness, not something he is doing as an exercise, genuine politeness suppressing his own hurt and problems... He acknowledges every person, and expresses his gratitude for every little chance he gets. While talking to his prospective clients, he thanks them every single time without any bitterness or grudge, even though he knows they are either stalling, or rejecting his proposition.
Swallowing, swallowing, swallowing (sometimes writhing in hurt and the injustice of a situation)....but always maintaining a positive politeness.....
In the end, this politeness is what lingers as a perfume when one recalls the person....
20 February 2012
An unfortunate incident in Cal...
happened the other day. The papers were full of a young mother of two being raped in a car.
What did she do? - she went to a nightclub with her friends to unwind. However, she stayed on after her friends left and accepted a ride back home from some decent-looking and decent-sounding young men.
She was brutally assaulted and raped and then dumped
A 54-year-old Minister of State in the Trinamool Congress Government goes: "Why did a woman with kids at home, who is separated from her husband, go to a nightclub. For all you know, she may still be drinking at a club."
Unbelievable is the only word I can think of because my mind is churning with all kinds of thoughts.
The only thing which this unfortunate lady did was to not go home with her friends, and to accept the offer of a ride by young boys she had just met. (As it happens these boys were from upper middle class families!!!)
It is a painful but true fact that our society is not ready for emancipated women. In fact, hypocritical society that we are, our goddesses are emancipated and are worshiped with much fanfare, but real-life women are treated little better than chattels, to be treated any which way. So why give men a chance to use their brute strength.
It is terribly sad that women have to go on playing second fiddle to men, who are most of the time somewhere in the region of pond scum.
We must never put ourselves in a situation that has the potential (maybe a remote one) of turning ugly. We need to use our wits to best men, and live our lives the way we want, and believe me we have the wits to do so...
Every woman has every right to want to unwind, to want a life of her own, to be herself...whether she is in college, or is a mother, or is a grandmother - she has the right to enjoy life her way... .There aren't too many opportunities for women to relax and unwind, but we can do it, and we must - only thing is that we have to be careful, and there are even times we cannot be too careful. Predators and marauders do go about in sophisticated coverings...
I hope no woman after reading this mishap buckles down - every woman has a right to her life and every right to want to make her life something, and this she should never ever give up. We can and we must and we have to be able to look at ourselves in the mirror every day, and walk with our head high. We truly have to believe we are not second to anyone.....and have as much right to this earth as anyone else....Being careful is just a tiny price to pay.....
What did she do? - she went to a nightclub with her friends to unwind. However, she stayed on after her friends left and accepted a ride back home from some decent-looking and decent-sounding young men.
She was brutally assaulted and raped and then dumped
A 54-year-old Minister of State in the Trinamool Congress Government goes: "Why did a woman with kids at home, who is separated from her husband, go to a nightclub. For all you know, she may still be drinking at a club."
Unbelievable is the only word I can think of because my mind is churning with all kinds of thoughts.
The only thing which this unfortunate lady did was to not go home with her friends, and to accept the offer of a ride by young boys she had just met. (As it happens these boys were from upper middle class families!!!)
It is a painful but true fact that our society is not ready for emancipated women. In fact, hypocritical society that we are, our goddesses are emancipated and are worshiped with much fanfare, but real-life women are treated little better than chattels, to be treated any which way. So why give men a chance to use their brute strength.
It is terribly sad that women have to go on playing second fiddle to men, who are most of the time somewhere in the region of pond scum.
We must never put ourselves in a situation that has the potential (maybe a remote one) of turning ugly. We need to use our wits to best men, and live our lives the way we want, and believe me we have the wits to do so...
Every woman has every right to want to unwind, to want a life of her own, to be herself...whether she is in college, or is a mother, or is a grandmother - she has the right to enjoy life her way... .There aren't too many opportunities for women to relax and unwind, but we can do it, and we must - only thing is that we have to be careful, and there are even times we cannot be too careful. Predators and marauders do go about in sophisticated coverings...
I hope no woman after reading this mishap buckles down - every woman has a right to her life and every right to want to make her life something, and this she should never ever give up. We can and we must and we have to be able to look at ourselves in the mirror every day, and walk with our head high. We truly have to believe we are not second to anyone.....and have as much right to this earth as anyone else....Being careful is just a tiny price to pay.....
It is true...
that miracles do happen...that prayers are answered...
There are many who say that this is too simplistic (which means treating complex issues and problems are treated as if they were much simpler than they really are - Oxford Dictionary), since life is complex and complicated.
However, I do have evidence to prove the contrary...
Moreover, why would an omnipotent God ever want to try us and make life difficult - He gave us life - and He wanted us to enjoy life. We, in our 'wisdom' decide to do things that end up making life complicated, unhappy, and desperate. And then, fall back on Him wanting Him to untangle us and our faith... .Even then, He never tries us beyond our strength. It is we who somehow manage to so entangle ourselves that life seems totally beyond us... .All we have to do is something very simple - just lean on Him, and know that only that will happen to us which He in His wisdom has ordained for us, and for which He gives us strength and courage....
and yes, it is that simple - miracles do happen...if we just stop struggling.....and they happen when we least expect them to, and in a quiet unobtrusive way...
There are many who say that this is too simplistic (which means treating complex issues and problems are treated as if they were much simpler than they really are - Oxford Dictionary), since life is complex and complicated.
However, I do have evidence to prove the contrary...
Moreover, why would an omnipotent God ever want to try us and make life difficult - He gave us life - and He wanted us to enjoy life. We, in our 'wisdom' decide to do things that end up making life complicated, unhappy, and desperate. And then, fall back on Him wanting Him to untangle us and our faith... .Even then, He never tries us beyond our strength. It is we who somehow manage to so entangle ourselves that life seems totally beyond us... .All we have to do is something very simple - just lean on Him, and know that only that will happen to us which He in His wisdom has ordained for us, and for which He gives us strength and courage....
and yes, it is that simple - miracles do happen...if we just stop struggling.....and they happen when we least expect them to, and in a quiet unobtrusive way...
15 February 2012
Something I've learnt...
How to deal with pressure.
Temperamentally, I buckle under the tiniest pressure. But, of late, one of life's inexplicable turns has put me in a situation where I work under a lot of pressure, and this is what I've learnt:
When under pressure, the inner guy who has a great deal of self-esteem (even if you consciously do not have an iota of it), and feeling of self-preservation, takes over, and before you know it - he takes command, puts your panic-stricken heart out of order, sedates your zinging mind, gets your fingers activated (to work at the computer), and puts all the concentration into the brain so that the work gets done even before you are consciously aware of it.....this procedure on a daily basis drives out every tiny vestige of alarm, and trepidation, and very efficiently quells any rising hysteria...
and so when life wanted me to learn how to deal with pressure, since advice and self-help books were obviously not working, it got me into a high-pressured situation, and now I can respond to any kind of pressure with the happiest equanimity....let pressure come on!!!!!
Temperamentally, I buckle under the tiniest pressure. But, of late, one of life's inexplicable turns has put me in a situation where I work under a lot of pressure, and this is what I've learnt:
When under pressure, the inner guy who has a great deal of self-esteem (even if you consciously do not have an iota of it), and feeling of self-preservation, takes over, and before you know it - he takes command, puts your panic-stricken heart out of order, sedates your zinging mind, gets your fingers activated (to work at the computer), and puts all the concentration into the brain so that the work gets done even before you are consciously aware of it.....this procedure on a daily basis drives out every tiny vestige of alarm, and trepidation, and very efficiently quells any rising hysteria...
and so when life wanted me to learn how to deal with pressure, since advice and self-help books were obviously not working, it got me into a high-pressured situation, and now I can respond to any kind of pressure with the happiest equanimity....let pressure come on!!!!!
Are we ready...
for Valentine's Day?
Every year, on the 15th, there are gory accounts of young boys and girls who have taken out their 'revenge' either on themselves, or on the ones they 'loved'.
Are our young, who teeter between irresponsibility and Bollywood in a hypocritical society, really ready to take on love?
Forget the historical background of St. Valentine, Valentine's Day, world over, is taken as a day for celebrating love.
Love, however, has certain commitments built into it:
Respect - for oneself and for the other
Responsibility - towards each other
Rapture - of a life shared
If we're looking at the Day as a celebration of love day, then we need to celebrate all love - for each other, for our parents and siblings, for friends and colleagues - the world in general...
And, if we're looking at Valentine's Day as a fun day, then we need to enjoy it as just that - a fun day - balloons, hearts, mush, and loads of plain and simple merriment...
Every year, on the 15th, there are gory accounts of young boys and girls who have taken out their 'revenge' either on themselves, or on the ones they 'loved'.
Are our young, who teeter between irresponsibility and Bollywood in a hypocritical society, really ready to take on love?
Forget the historical background of St. Valentine, Valentine's Day, world over, is taken as a day for celebrating love.
Love, however, has certain commitments built into it:
Respect - for oneself and for the other
Responsibility - towards each other
Rapture - of a life shared
If we're looking at the Day as a celebration of love day, then we need to celebrate all love - for each other, for our parents and siblings, for friends and colleagues - the world in general...
And, if we're looking at Valentine's Day as a fun day, then we need to enjoy it as just that - a fun day - balloons, hearts, mush, and loads of plain and simple merriment...
13 February 2012
Here's something...
that will hit you between your eyes...
It's from Toni Morrison's book, A Mercy:
A mother, torn by the various forces of her situation, forces a landowner, who had come to do business with her master, to take away her daughter - away from her, believing that she would be saving her daughter, and maybe giving her a chance at life...
Coming from the depths of a mother's heart, are these words for her daughter:
'to be given dominion over another is a hard thing; to wrest dominion over another is a wrong thing; to give dominion of yourself to another is a wicked thing.'
(Read dominion as control)
For, no matter that the body can be flogged, never give up control of your spirit to another....for then you are truly lost....
It's from Toni Morrison's book, A Mercy:
A mother, torn by the various forces of her situation, forces a landowner, who had come to do business with her master, to take away her daughter - away from her, believing that she would be saving her daughter, and maybe giving her a chance at life...
Coming from the depths of a mother's heart, are these words for her daughter:
'to be given dominion over another is a hard thing; to wrest dominion over another is a wrong thing; to give dominion of yourself to another is a wicked thing.'
(Read dominion as control)
For, no matter that the body can be flogged, never give up control of your spirit to another....for then you are truly lost....
Another article...
on Zizira: http://www.zizira.com/secure/literacy-and-education/
It's something that we all need to think about....
It's something that we all need to think about....
Today...
I will try - no, I have to find inside of myself the strength to say, "For now, I will accept this challenge, not knowing the reason but trusting the Universe has sent this to me for my own good and that someday I will fully understand." (From my Kabbalah reading)
Have you noticed how readings from devotional guides always offer solace for the day? Strange, but true....
Have you noticed how readings from devotional guides always offer solace for the day? Strange, but true....
12 February 2012
And again it's about...
the English language.
I cannot think of anything that is more painful for those who struggle with the English language - to speak it and to understand it. And this is only the verbal-aural aspect. The reading and understanding of written English is another story.
Yesterday, I was on the phone for almost three hours with the customer care executives of a company. My USB modem was not working, and these three youngsters, two boys and a girl were taking me through the steps trying to get it going. The girl and one of the boys, battling and struggling with English, got their instructions across. I was touched and impressed at their perseverance, and though I used some Hindi, hoping to get them to switch languages, they steadfastly battled on in English. The second boy, poor chap, was totally out of his depth - he didn't know whether to put on his faux-Yank accent, or just talk somehow-anyhow, and in the process got so entangled that not a word was legible. Though I requested him to please talk in Hindi, he refused to do so. Finally, I'm ashamed to say, I got thoroughly rattled because, neither was the problem getting solved, nor was I getting what he was saying. I knew he was struggling, but I was running out of time. I finally got him to register my complaint and get a technician to come home. However, I have sworn to myself that this will not happen again, especially when I fully understand what is happening.
The same thing with the technician - a very bright young lad who knew exactly what to do, and fixed the problem fixed very confidently. A Bengali lad with a smattering of Hindi and hardly any English, it was a joke the way we were communicating... .Once again - the English language stood like a demoniacal sceptre....The technician would have been brilliant had he been allowed to work & talk in his mother tongue. He, like all of us, would somehow have been able to manage Hindi, which is becoming increasingly a common language (except in the South). But English......!!!!!
This one thing - the English language - is what is finally going to prevent us from taking our place on the world stage. If our kids and young adults have to speak English so that it can be comprehended, they have to be taught the language as a skill. HAVE TO. Whether the school is an English medium one, or a vernacular one, or whether the background is a westernized one or a traditional Indian one.....English has to be taught as a foreign language and as a skill. It is a tool that we have to learn to use.
And believe me, once we have that tool, there will be no stopping us. But till then.......????
I cannot think of anything that is more painful for those who struggle with the English language - to speak it and to understand it. And this is only the verbal-aural aspect. The reading and understanding of written English is another story.
Yesterday, I was on the phone for almost three hours with the customer care executives of a company. My USB modem was not working, and these three youngsters, two boys and a girl were taking me through the steps trying to get it going. The girl and one of the boys, battling and struggling with English, got their instructions across. I was touched and impressed at their perseverance, and though I used some Hindi, hoping to get them to switch languages, they steadfastly battled on in English. The second boy, poor chap, was totally out of his depth - he didn't know whether to put on his faux-Yank accent, or just talk somehow-anyhow, and in the process got so entangled that not a word was legible. Though I requested him to please talk in Hindi, he refused to do so. Finally, I'm ashamed to say, I got thoroughly rattled because, neither was the problem getting solved, nor was I getting what he was saying. I knew he was struggling, but I was running out of time. I finally got him to register my complaint and get a technician to come home. However, I have sworn to myself that this will not happen again, especially when I fully understand what is happening.
The same thing with the technician - a very bright young lad who knew exactly what to do, and fixed the problem fixed very confidently. A Bengali lad with a smattering of Hindi and hardly any English, it was a joke the way we were communicating... .Once again - the English language stood like a demoniacal sceptre....The technician would have been brilliant had he been allowed to work & talk in his mother tongue. He, like all of us, would somehow have been able to manage Hindi, which is becoming increasingly a common language (except in the South). But English......!!!!!
This one thing - the English language - is what is finally going to prevent us from taking our place on the world stage. If our kids and young adults have to speak English so that it can be comprehended, they have to be taught the language as a skill. HAVE TO. Whether the school is an English medium one, or a vernacular one, or whether the background is a westernized one or a traditional Indian one.....English has to be taught as a foreign language and as a skill. It is a tool that we have to learn to use.
And believe me, once we have that tool, there will be no stopping us. But till then.......????
11 February 2012
It's worrying...
students, and most often it's the bright ones, committing suicide for the flimsiest of reasons,
students refusing to accept any kind of discipline in school
students having increasingly short fuses
teachers feeling cornered and wondering why on earth they should even bother to say anything considering they might be the next victim of a student's wrath (a student stabbed a teacher to death in a classroom in a school in Madras), or the media
parents claiming their children don't listen to them
competitiveness hitting unmanageable levels, just because there are not enough 'good' colleges or universities for kids to go to
a society which is increasingly becoming more and more demanding
an economy which divides you cruelly into one of two categories - rich and poor
So, where are we going wrong?
As adults we are just not seeing that children/young adults today are being bombarded with all kinds of things, unconsciously and consciously, every nanosecond - the nerves in their brains are on overdrive. And, very simply, they are just not equipped to handle it. They do not have the mental or psychological capacity to decipher all the stimuli pinging on their brains; or the intellectual power to process and synthesize the data coming in. As for the emotional capacity to accept what is happening, that is way, way off...
As teachers we cannot write them off, After their parents, teachers are the ones who influence these young minds. Teachers just have to find some way of communicating with these young ones. After all they have age and maturity and experience on their side...
As parents, we have to be very attentive to our children. We know them and any sign of their being or doing anything that is not 'them', should be taken as a warning light........ and we better sit up and take notice of it. Children have different ways of communicating what is bothering them or troubling them. Often they themselves don't know why they are troubled... .We, their parents have to see if they are behaving in any manner that is not their usual way... .It is up to us as the primary care givers to our children, to find some platform on which to communicate with them. If we show them that we respect them for who they are, that they are precious to us, no matter what 'society' thinks, or whoever thinks, we'll be helping them to find themselves.
We put too much pressure on our kids, adding to the outside pressure they are already under - we live our dreams through them, we want them to succeed, we want them to go higher, and demand that they get 'good' jobs, etcetcetc....but in all this, we forget that they have their own personalities - we tend to take away from them the right to be themselves - they have to be us, or what we want them to be...or else......
How can scolding or pressurizing help, when the young one doesn't even understand what he is doing or what is happening to him? It's taking him all his energies to just stay afloat - and drowning is a very painful thing whether it's drowning in water, or drowning in the huge, huge amount of varying data impinging on his unformed brain...
What our young need is unconditional love and acceptance....and to stand behind them as they strive to find their place in the sun........................................as themselves......
students refusing to accept any kind of discipline in school
students having increasingly short fuses
teachers feeling cornered and wondering why on earth they should even bother to say anything considering they might be the next victim of a student's wrath (a student stabbed a teacher to death in a classroom in a school in Madras), or the media
parents claiming their children don't listen to them
competitiveness hitting unmanageable levels, just because there are not enough 'good' colleges or universities for kids to go to
a society which is increasingly becoming more and more demanding
an economy which divides you cruelly into one of two categories - rich and poor
So, where are we going wrong?
As adults we are just not seeing that children/young adults today are being bombarded with all kinds of things, unconsciously and consciously, every nanosecond - the nerves in their brains are on overdrive. And, very simply, they are just not equipped to handle it. They do not have the mental or psychological capacity to decipher all the stimuli pinging on their brains; or the intellectual power to process and synthesize the data coming in. As for the emotional capacity to accept what is happening, that is way, way off...
As teachers we cannot write them off, After their parents, teachers are the ones who influence these young minds. Teachers just have to find some way of communicating with these young ones. After all they have age and maturity and experience on their side...
As parents, we have to be very attentive to our children. We know them and any sign of their being or doing anything that is not 'them', should be taken as a warning light........ and we better sit up and take notice of it. Children have different ways of communicating what is bothering them or troubling them. Often they themselves don't know why they are troubled... .We, their parents have to see if they are behaving in any manner that is not their usual way... .It is up to us as the primary care givers to our children, to find some platform on which to communicate with them. If we show them that we respect them for who they are, that they are precious to us, no matter what 'society' thinks, or whoever thinks, we'll be helping them to find themselves.
We put too much pressure on our kids, adding to the outside pressure they are already under - we live our dreams through them, we want them to succeed, we want them to go higher, and demand that they get 'good' jobs, etcetcetc....but in all this, we forget that they have their own personalities - we tend to take away from them the right to be themselves - they have to be us, or what we want them to be...or else......
How can scolding or pressurizing help, when the young one doesn't even understand what he is doing or what is happening to him? It's taking him all his energies to just stay afloat - and drowning is a very painful thing whether it's drowning in water, or drowning in the huge, huge amount of varying data impinging on his unformed brain...
What our young need is unconditional love and acceptance....and to stand behind them as they strive to find their place in the sun........................................as themselves......
10 February 2012
Today...
I am going to squash my mind every time it comes up with analysis, rationalizing, fearful thoughts, upsetting words, painful images...
I am NOT going to look at myself through anyone else's eyes but my own...
I am going to be the person I believe I am and that I was intended to be...
Hurray!!!
I am NOT going to look at myself through anyone else's eyes but my own...
I am going to be the person I believe I am and that I was intended to be...
Hurray!!!
07 February 2012
Two wonderful movies...
Hachiko for lessons in unswerving love, loyalty, and absolute devotion...
and
Karate Kid for toughness of spirit, grit, and determination...
05 February 2012
Talking about...
systems...
A basic definition of system is a political or social order.
We all live in a system composed of many smaller parts which are systems in themselves. Flouting any of these, going against them. breaking them, fighting them, or even deviating from them causes a fair amount of pain and discomfort to say the least, and one ends up spending time defending oneself - time which could be used to live... . So what do we do? Accept blindly whatever these orders or systems put us into? Certainly not - if some system, or part of a system goes against what you believe, or value, you cannot accept it, but remember that in trying to fight a system, the propagators of that will close ranks and you will find yourself up against a huge, huge wall. Better than that would be to try and work within the system. I'll share an example that I've learnt - when we were in the Gulf, every man and every woman wore the National costume of the dishdasha and abaya. Under this however, many wore designer wear... . How better to explain how to be within the system, and yet be yourself, and live the way you believe?
And we can work this in whatever system we find ourselves... . Try it, I do...
(A word of caution: never do anything unethical when trying to work your own way within the system - that's bound to boomerang and come back very badly at that...)
The only time one has to or needs to or must break a system is if it oppresses the spirit or soul to the point of destruction - then it is far, far better to opt totally out of the system and create your own way... . And, believe me, since this is a matter of the soul, and the spirit, you will find the strength within to combat anything that comes in your path...
A basic definition of system is a political or social order.
We all live in a system composed of many smaller parts which are systems in themselves. Flouting any of these, going against them. breaking them, fighting them, or even deviating from them causes a fair amount of pain and discomfort to say the least, and one ends up spending time defending oneself - time which could be used to live... . So what do we do? Accept blindly whatever these orders or systems put us into? Certainly not - if some system, or part of a system goes against what you believe, or value, you cannot accept it, but remember that in trying to fight a system, the propagators of that will close ranks and you will find yourself up against a huge, huge wall. Better than that would be to try and work within the system. I'll share an example that I've learnt - when we were in the Gulf, every man and every woman wore the National costume of the dishdasha and abaya. Under this however, many wore designer wear... . How better to explain how to be within the system, and yet be yourself, and live the way you believe?
And we can work this in whatever system we find ourselves... . Try it, I do...
(A word of caution: never do anything unethical when trying to work your own way within the system - that's bound to boomerang and come back very badly at that...)
The only time one has to or needs to or must break a system is if it oppresses the spirit or soul to the point of destruction - then it is far, far better to opt totally out of the system and create your own way... . And, believe me, since this is a matter of the soul, and the spirit, you will find the strength within to combat anything that comes in your path...
03 February 2012
Sharing...
01 February 2012
Finally...
got fed up of crib - crib - crib and wrote this: http://www.zizira.com/secure/are-we-appreciative-enough/
Sharing...
doubles happiness, and redoubles efforts to become strong and happy again....
there's a rider -
you need a good, caring, loving friend for sharing, just anybody won't do...
there's a rider -
you need a good, caring, loving friend for sharing, just anybody won't do...
How many of us...
even know that it is our responsibility to see to it that we are happy and fulfilled persons?
Know it now....this is our obligation and duty to ourselves, especially since we are also to care for those around us...
Start with GRATITUDE for who we are, what we are, what we have, what we do, and the way we use our lives, (make changes to ensure gratefulness)
then be CONTENT
and then,
SHARE
Know it now....this is our obligation and duty to ourselves, especially since we are also to care for those around us...
Start with GRATITUDE for who we are, what we are, what we have, what we do, and the way we use our lives, (make changes to ensure gratefulness)
then be CONTENT
and then,
SHARE
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